Last week my dad took a turn for the worse. He has been fighting a pressure sore for 9 months which has become a spreading infection. Tests today will reveal just how far the infection has gone into his abdominal cavity.
My sweet husband and I prayed for over a week until Rick felt it would be ok for me to make the long drive to Tenn. with our three younger girls. God’s timing is perfect. I was able to be with my Dad here at home for a whole day. I helped mom with doing vitals (who says there is just one nurse in this family!!! ) trying to encourage him to eat, keeping the fluids going and holding his hands while rubbing his arms which comforts him.
Sunday afternoon there was enough of a change that when the home-nurse came she felt it was time to get him to the hospital. Dad has always been against any hospital visit but this time he agreed. He expressed his fear of not being in control of decisions in the hospital but we reminded him that we would be there on “his” team to speak for him if need be.
The call for the ambulance went out and I went on the front porch to call Rick and tell him what was going on. When I walked in I heard sweet singing in Dad’s room and when I entered it I found Kristi and Annie perched on stools singing hymns to their Grandpa while he waited. THe hymns kept him calm and later the night Kristi told me that while singing Amazing Grace my Dad brought his head up off the pillow and sang a line with them. I will forever with I could have caught that on film.
Mom and I followed to the hospital and waited with him in the emergency room for 2 hours as they did tests and evaluated the situation. Sweet southern kindness came with every nurse and doctor. We were not there long before a deacon showed up and blessed us with kind words and prayer.
Dad has been so sweet, his humor still evident even when so very sick.
Mom had propped Dad’s head in her arm as we waited and at one point she asked him if it was uncomfortable. Dad gave a big smile and said, “oh no, this is just wonderful!”
I have had some alone time with Dad last night and this morning.
Dad talks very slowly and about 3-4 words is all he can say at a time.
I commented to him that he has been married almost 50 years. He eyes opened wide and he said, “that’s a long time!”
We have discussed faith and heaven. My shoutin’ Baptist Daddy is still Amening, only in a quiet voice.
This morning the doctor came and said that the infection may have spread into the abdomen, tests this afternoon will tell. Dad took in the hard news that this is not good. His doctor, a brother in the Lord held his hand while he told him. Dad commented that the alternative to surgery is pretty good, referring to heaven.
When we talked to the doctor in the hall, he spoke so highly of the care that my mother has given to my Dad. Dr. Gardner wiped his eyes as he told how she has never complained or made a negative comment about this very hard work, he said she is a remarkable woman……. there are not words to describe her love and dedication. My sisters and I may never be able to fill her shoes..
Mom continues on bravely, tears are beautiful.
My precious father who has fought such a good fight through so many years of hard living continues to glorify the Lord even while being in a hospital bed. His faith is so strong.
I told him this morning that the greatest gift he has given me is his life of faith. His love and dedication to God and the body of Christ, lived out before me has been beautiful and has made me who I am today.
After a few moments Dad quietly responded:
The greatest gift I have given you…… is your Mother.
I wept.
He told me he did not think the end of his life would be like this.
I agreed.
He said that it is good that we do not know how the end will be beforehand.
I agreed.
After some time he raised his head and said:
There is no other option for me than heaven.
Well said my hero, well said.
He was always patient with me. I will miss seeing he and Auntie Char together, him the strong man and protecter, man of ideas and ambitions, balancing my sweet Auntie, strong in her own way, but smaller and gentler, sweet smiles and loving words, supporting her husband, always by his side. Praise the Lord for His ability to care for her.
